So, sometimes you lose your spark. It happens. Life fades into dull shades of duties and energy-draining routines. You feel the emptiness creeping in and restlessness settles in the pit of your stomach. You want to live your life with passion and zest, but sleeping in and procrastinating sound pretty darn good too. Sometimes the haze is welcomed by redundancy, other times by the overwhelming chaos of change, either way it leaves you feeling lethargic and paralyzed. But then, if you’re lucky, a craving starts to sprout, rooting its way through your veins, a craving to live again to see the light and joy, to see yourself doing the things you yearn to accomplish. Yet, the motivation doesn’t follow. You feel tired. Drained. Hopeless. So you continue treading the waters of an uninspired life.
Well, it sure as heck does to me, cause that’s my life, like, right now. I feel like a tumble-weed being tossed around in a place as dead as a desert. But every once in a blue moon, in the dead of night, the wind ceases and the restlessness quits, and I remember how I used to laugh. Not that I don’t laugh now, but I don’t laugh like I used to – with a freedom, with soul and mind and body, with the strength of knowing that whatever happens, I’m going to be okay. These days, I laugh small. I laugh while wanting to hide, to be safe, to be certain.
How did I get from point A to point B? I can only tell you it didn’t happen overnight. And I can tell you now, we won’t find our way out in a day either. I just hope you will hold on with me. Brace yourself. Persevere. And in the meantime, capture those little moments when the sun breaks through, store them in your heart until the light bursts from the seams of your soul and you find your spark has returned as flames. Believe me. One day, it will.